Save the Children

Attention America.  We have an opportunity to save a precious child --- specifically a 10-year old little girl from a town outside Pittsburgh --- from the same path of sin and iniquity followed by the likes of Britney Spears, Paris Hilton and Lindsey Lohan.  I would include Snooki from “Jersey Shore” in this list, but I’m talking about actual celebrities here.

The child’s name is Jackie Evancho and she has a darn good chance of winning this national TV talent show known as “America’s Got Talent.”  It’s actually a very entertaining show that has aired on NBC for five seasons now.  You know the drill.  People from all over the country come and audition before a panel of judges in hopes of fame, fortune, a million-dollar prize and supposedly a big show in Las Vegas.  Unlike other reality contests, AGT brings them in from every conceivable area of “entertainment,” and I use the term loosely.  Sadly, I have watched all five seasons, so I am a bit of an expert.

On AGT, for certain you will see singers, dancers, musicians and the like.  But you’ll also see magicians of every genre, old guys playing harmonicas, bicycle stunt artists and young people messing with electricity.  There always seems to be an abundance of older people, grasping at this opportunity as their one last chance to fulfill a lifetime dream.  It can be inspirational, touching and sickening, all at the same time.

But back to Jackie.  This season, the show has come down to four finalists: An opera singer who dresses like a clown and acts like Lady Gaga; a bluesy singer-guitarist who is actually pretty good, but has little to no personality; a performing troupe of what looks like 50 people all dressed in reflective black light clothing doing acrobatic stunts to music; and then Jackie, a fresh-faced little girl with a voice you would expect to come out of someone much older and accomplished.  To say she sounds angelic is an understatement.  She really is very good.

But here’s my issue.  Based on what we know from this experiment of American Pop Culture, do we really want to throw a 10-year old girl, no matter how talented, into the pressures of a Las Vegas show and all that comes with it?  Many young girls have walked into that limelight before and, like a bad tanning salon, it burns bad.

There were other talented kids on this year’s show who were somehow spared from this danger.  Two African-American hip-hop dancers called Future Funk; an impressive dancing duo named Anna and Patryk; and singing sisters named Christina and Ali.  Keep an eye on Anna and Ali, as I think they’ll be back in some form or another.

But sweet little Jackie: A talent, no doubt, but is she ready for fame?  As a kid, I remember watching my grandmother bake delicious cakes and cookies, which I would want as soon as possible.  I would open the oven door, only to hear “They’re not ready yet.”  Sure, I hated the delay, but learned later that it was worth it.  As the country song says, “Let Them Be Little,” because they’re not ready yet.

So here’s my prediction, roughly eight-hours before the show’s finale takes to the air tonight.  Michael Grimm, the singer, wins the whole thing.  He’s older and seasoned and ready, even if his voice is not as good as Jackie’s.  Prince Poppycock, the opera singing clown, fades into the world of Cher impressionists; and the dance group, Fighting Gravity, realizes it was a nice run while it lasted but it’s time to move on….with the lights off or on.

Where does that leave Jackie?  If we are a good and decent people, we send her back to suburban Pittsburgh with an enormous boost to her self-confidence, maybe a CD project here and there, and a life where she is able to do what other 10-year olds do: Grow up.

So let her be little.  There’s always time for sin and iniquity when she’s older. 

Just ask Snooki.

Jerry's Kids

So I’m flipping through the channels last night and stumble upon the annual Jerry Lewis Labor Day Telethon.  Having just walked in from a trip out of town, I had almost forgotten it was that time again.  But every year, there he is: Jerry Lewis, the slapstick comedian whose heyday was easily 40-50 years ago when he teamed with Dean Martin, followed by a not-as-successful solo career in movies and television.

This was the 45th annual telethon for Muscular Dystrophy and Jerry is now around 108-years-old.  I confirmed it all on Wikipedia, so it must be true.

Something draws me to Jerry and his telethon every year.  I think it represents something we don’t see much anymore.  The program is, at best, schmaltzy.  Coming to you live from Las Vegas, where else can you see Charo and Norm Crosby rubbing elbows with David Archuleta and Lynyrd Skynyrd?  In Jerry’s World, Billy Gilman is still a big star.  And women like Nancy O’Dell and Alison Sweeney fawn over the host like he’s still, you know, 75 or something.

I love watching the telethon, especially in the wee hours of the night when the star power tends to wane.  “Ladies and gentlemen, he’s always here to help my kids, please welcome Emmett Kelly, IV, right cheer.”  That’s followed by jugglers, plate-spinners and more Billy Gilman.  And does Jerry ever wear the complete tux?  That tie always seems to be dangling from the collar, even in the first hour.

But Jerry and his Vegas cast are not alone.  Each hour, there is a local cut-in, where hosts from your town are shown standing in front of the phone bank, talking to firemen, business owners, beauty queens and even local victims of the disease.  It can all be very touching, and always seems to make the phones ring.

Here in Atlanta, for more than 30 years, the team has been made up of a local weatherman, Ken Cook, along with country disc-jockey Rhubarb Jones, and a third person from the independent station that now carries the program.  It used to be carried on the local CBS, then FOX, affiliate, but I guess compassion is passing when there are Labor Day retail sales to advertise.

In the 70s and 80s, the host was Guy Sharpe, one of the old guard local weathermen who preceded today’s fancy meteorologists.  Guy didn’t need a seal from the American Meteorological Society to draw his storm clouds and smiling sunshine’s with a grease pencil.  And radar?  Who needs a radar?

Guy was perfect as the local MDA host.  He would start strong on the opening night, but before it was over, true to his roots as a United Methodist minister, he would be crying and pulling on your heartstrings.  He could get me every year by simply interviewing that year’s local poster child.

Ken followed Guy as the weatherman at WAGA-TV, and in doing so, picked up the MDA hosting duties, but they often brought Guy back from the rival NBC affiliate for old time’s sake.  Such was the spirit of Jerry’s telethon.

As a child one summer, I went the extra mile, and signed up to host a Ronald McDonald MDA “carnival” in my driveway.  You sent away for a kit and they mailed you back all kinds of game ideas and signage.  With the help of several friends, we threw the best MDA carnival Farris Drive in Decatur, Georgia, had ever seen.  And after a fun-filled day, when we totaled up the proceeds, it was over $500.  I don’t think any of us had ever seen that much money in one place before.  Then the ethical quandary raised its ugly head.

Did we really need to send in all of that money?  Couldn’t we keep some of it for ourselves?  To be honest, the question was debated for a while.  Certainly they would expect us to cover expenses.  What about all the time we had put into the carnival, preparing for over a week?

Then we all thought about Guy Sharpe interviewing those kids in the wheelchairs and the stories about how they lived for a summer camp where they could play and swim together without people staring; the stories about advancements in medical treatments, and how they might be getting closer to a cure.  We just couldn’t do it.  We mailed in every last penny, and even threw in some money of our own, just to make the total look better.

Someone once said that integrity is doing the right thing even when no one is looking.  That day, my friends and I showed integrity, because we knew God was looking. And for all we knew, Jerry Lewis also.

As I write this, this year’s telethon is drawing to a close.  The total raised appears to be well over $59-million, even at a time when the economy and the job market are so tough.  I’m glad Jerry was there again this year, and I hope that somehow they find a cure for muscular dystrophy and its related diseases.

Now, they’re interviewing that poster child again.  Where did I put that phone?

If this touched you in any way, let’s call that a sign and follow this link to make a donation:
http://www.mda.org/telethon/2010Telethon